I have a secret I’ve been keeping that I think it’s time I came clean about.
When I think about why I haven’t really talked about this explicitly, it seems obvious.
It’s the thing everyone everywhere likes to exploit for profit or shame for profit.
Either way, I’ve found myself in an in between place.
How do I talk about the simplicity that is sensuality?
How do I explain something that is our natural birthright simply as that?
The experience of our natural birthright?
How do I speak through all of the heavy layers of cultural, social, patriarchal, religious, and taboo baggage we all carry around our bodies?
The thing I practice and teach is embodiment.
But the thing I’ve frankly been avoiding talking about openly is the inevitable sensual awakening that naturally unfolds as we begin to feel safe enough to explore the inner spaces.
Even in my own personal practice, where embodied meditation and movement licks at the edge of both orgasm and innocence, where I myself often don’t know what to make of the experience of the expression that flows through me.
The only thing I truly know is to trust my body.
Trust the intelligence that is the experience of my creation.
And trust the relationship I’ve nurtured, healed, and that has blossomed with this deep practice in sensual listening.
It’s why I don’t talk about healing my relationship to sexual pleasure and orgasm.
It’s why I don’t talk about sex or orgasm at all.
It’s why I don’t teach using sexual energy for manifestation.
Because the thing I touch again and again feels so much more profound than the single layer of sexuality.
The thing I meet over and over again is so simple – so innocent.
I’m reminded of my first experience in a Continuum class.
The workshop was called “Finding Eros” or something like that, and was taught by a matriarch of a woman in her late 70’s who had healed long term paralysis caused by childhood post-polio syndrome.
I remembered thinking that most people would look at the poster for the workshop and assume it had something to do with sex or sacred sex, or tantra.
It was in fact a much deeper teaching – I suppose you could say it was a way of connecting the the fundamental or underlying relationship that all else is born from.
There were no orgasm demonstrations, no manipulating of sexual or sensual energy.
Just the simple teaching of riding the wave of my own internal breath of life.
The life that moves us much like the tides and ripples of orgasmic pulse.
I’ve also been meditating a lot on the dark womb space.
Dark matter.
The dark of creation.
The fecund darkness from which we were all created.
I keep getting the same image of a dark starry night in my own womb – the darkness of the unknown, making space for the tiny bursts of atomic light known as stars or spirit to come through.
Maybe they are children.
Maybe they are art.
Maybe they are music or angels or the pillars of my work.
I think this is the thing at the root of many of our desires that we might not yet have language for.
I think it’s time now to remember that language and to start to talk openly about our sensual creative potential.
It’s time for Eros to emerge once again.
It’s time to explore with innocent eyes and beginners mind, the vast valleys, rivers, and mountains of our bodies.
This is earthy work and we are the earth herself.
Embodiment is so much more than healing trauma or rewriting old stories that hold us back.
It’s the birthplace of our limitless potential here on earth – in the physical plane.
It’s the language that helps us understand our experience here – the constant compression and expansion of polarity.
It’s remembering the force that rides that polarity – the force that formed us, breathed us into being.
And along the way to returning home to the centre of our being, yes, we may heal trauma, awaken new potential in orgasm, deepen intimacy, bring harmony in relationship, and help humanity evolve … all at the same time.
So I think it’s time I talked about orgasm.
Sex.
Death and transformation.
It’s time I talked about our sensorial relationship to our voice and our pelvis through the harmonic resonance of the throat and the cervix.
It’s time we explored and deepened our relationship to our wild, animal selves.
Not for extraction.
Not for commodification.
But because simply it is our birthright as living, full, juicy creatures in this experience called life in human form.
xx
jenn