the state of things … a pondering

I’ve been pondering a lot lately … The state of the world, the all encompassing doom that often is being felt, circulated, recirculated yet again, on all the platforms, in all the ways …   I have been contemplating a lot about this lately …   Perhaps it’s because I have an abundance of time…

Read more

honing home

The concept of “home” has been of particular interest to me my whole life. I suspect I’m not alone in this quest. However our yearning, our sense of honing in on what home is and what it means seems to come about in different ways for each of us.   In the recent years of…

Read more

you can’t always get what you want

You can’t always get what you wantYou can’t always get what you wantYou can’t always get what you wantBut if you try sometimes, well, you just might findYou get what you need   Let’s break this down … On one hand, we have New Age Spirituality telling us that if we want something sincerely enough,…

Read more

waiting for the ground swell

What is your capacity to sit in the liminal? What is your tolerance for waiting and listening for the ground swell?   Mine is growing. Every day. I have been sitting in this bardo for years now. Listening. Deep surrender. Sometimes and often … Modulating between wanting for something to happen … And waiting for…

Read more

mutual ambivalence

mutual ambivalence.   These were the words that came to me as I was contemplating my relationship with my mother this morning. Mutual ambivalence.   Esther Perel speaks to ambivalence in all ranges and types of relationships: “Ambivalence exists in every relational configuration, but we put a lot of pressure on romantic love, in particular,…

Read more

substance part 1

People want substance these days. Hell, I want substance these days.   An astrologer I listen to used the term the other day that struck me. She said “in the spiritual entertainment business …”   There it is. The Spiritual Entertainment Business.   Calling it exactly how it is.   That’s exactly what the majority of our…

Read more

a word on punishment

My mom said something to me this morning that was so revealing and it struck deep. A flippant remark, yet, telling. Telling of humanity perhaps or our maturity as a collective perhaps – I’m still not sure.   She was talking about my cat actually. We’ve just recently been letting my indoor/outdoor cat outside in…

Read more

musings on slowness

On a personal level, my nickname in high school was “slow-mo”. It was given and used with endearment and love – I was not amused. However I could not shake the truth of the thing – I at my essence, at my core, am slow. I have always carried within me a deep well of…

Read more

an unexpected realization

In my previous post I shared my experience of how a flash of frustration and anger revealed threads of underlying grief in a spontaneous keening that sprang fourth from my body (you can read that whole post HERE).   What I didn’t realize at the time of practice or reflection or writing that post just…

Read more