choice point

I had a realization today. It’s one of those realizations that is cumulative, you know? Like you could feel it for years. Like you thought you knew it. Like you thought you were over it – or at least that your reckoning with it was done. Complete. And now I sit with it and realize…

Read more

take me to your healer

Temperance and The Devil Reversed The week of August 1st 2022 tarot spread.     For those of you who were curious about the recent spread from my Instagram stories here is part 1 (I think I’ll probably break it down in 3 parts over all since that’s how the spread landed – in 3 parts)….

Read more

letters to mom

Dear mom,   I’ve found myself thinking about you a lot these days.   Perhaps it’s the not fully understanding. You see, I miss the essence of mother. I find myself trying to reconstruct, reroot, start from scratch essentially, rebuilding these bones of existence that is mother.   I miss having a sense of security…

Read more

triggers

Let’s suppose for a moment, that you, like me are working on some kind of self-actualization.   Call it whatever you want. Even simply “being a better person”, or “being the best version of yourself you can be”.   A lot of us are striving for this for some reason or another. Just consider the…

Read more

Safety Security Home

I don’t think I’ve ever really talked about this publicly but in early 2020 I decided to disengage from almost all contact with my mom.   At present, July 13th 2022, I realize it’s been exactly 2 years since the last time we exchanged emails privately and since Christmas of 2019 since the last time…

Read more

Mourning My Future Self

The last year and a half have been a sort of unravelling so to speak. The illuminations that have revealed themselves – my truth – have been so starkly honest.   I am eternally grateful that I have the capacity and the self compassion for myself to be able to witness and digest Truth without…

Read more

The Practice of Being Human in Intimate Relationship

From today’s journal entry …   For context, I was contemplating my particular flavour of how I avoid intimacy. We all have different strategies, and a few years ago through deep inquiry, real life practice, and adventures in relationship experimentation, I discovered that my particular flavour is a kind of fog.   Keep things vague….

Read more

Can You Love Her, and Not Her Potential

Her, him, they, your own damn self – it doesn’t really matter who.   If you, like me have the blessing and curse of seeing the potential in others, then you may also fall into the trap of falling in love with who they could be rather than who they really are.   It’s ubiquitous…

Read more