How do you like to manipulate people? Today I thought I’d write about some of my personal favourite ways. If you think I’m joking, I most certainly am not! And if you think that you are “above” the subtle art of manipulation, think again – we all do it. If that ruffled your feathers a…
Read moreWhen Helping Is Not Helpful
We love to be helpful. From a very young age we are taught that helping makes us “good” people. Whether from a religious context or just simple kindergarden “we help each other” dogma, we learn that our value comes from how pleasant and “helpful” we are to others. While this may seem rather…
Read moreHooks, Manipulation, and Clear Boundaries
I want to talk about a dream I had last night. It was particularly powerful because it was a perfect example of my own deep healing and evolution in action. In the dream I was in conversation with a man I didn’t know. He was a stranger. And in our conversation and in…
Read moreI Judge People
It took me a really long time to be honest about this within myself. I judge people. You see, most of us don’t like to admit that we judge people. We’ve been taught that it makes us fundamentally “bad”, flawed, or even worse “un-evolved” humans, and so we deny deny deny. So what happens when…
Read moreThe Myth of The Strong Independent Woman
I used to think I had way more masculine energy than feminine energy. I was the no label, jeans and t-shirt wearing, mountain climbing, adventurous outdoor chick. I was definitely not a girly girl. Even growing up in a pretty liberal, hippy, idealist community where everything goes, I still absorbed these cultural norms we…
Read moreI Have Something to Say About Growth Mindset
I wanted to talk about something I see a lot i the self development world and is often totally misconstrued, and that’s risk taking. More specifically the relationship between risk taking and growth. You’ve heard it many, many, (many), times before. “Life begins outside of your comfort zone” “Great things never came from comfort…
Read moreMacho In Drag
We are under the illusion that we live in an equal society. This is a gross understatement and rather dangerous illusion. By “we” I mean the educated Western world. We believe that in this post-feminist era, here in the year 2022, we are somehow above our biology, our neurology, our history. We are not. In…
Read moreThe Hermit In Relationship
Today I wanted to write about my personal experience riding the thin line between being in connection, and checking out of the world for a while. I wanted to talk about the difference between unplugging and how it’s both an act of self care and self protection. The Hermit. I am an introvert. This…
Read moreProtection, Clarity, and Boundaries: Wolf-dog
This morning I pulled the King of Pentacles. Well really, he flew out of the deck and onto the table. Two things struck me immediately and I wanted to explore here one of those things in particular – the wolf-dog. The King sits in this warm vibrancy of security and accomplishment. He is…
Read moreHealthy Relationships and Boundaries – Agreements
One of the most important things I’ve learned about relationships over the past couple of years is making agreements. We make agreements whether we are conscious of it or not. Most of the time, we are totally oblivious that we are making them at the time and then we often feel victimized and helpless…
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