musings on slowness

On a personal level, my nickname in high school was “slow-mo”. It was given and used with endearment and love – I was not amused. However I could not shake the truth of the thing – I at my essence, at my core, am slow. I have always carried within me a deep well of…

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abundance

I seriously think we have this abundance thing wrong. We’ve confused abundance for material wealth and possessions. We’ve confused it with having a house, or land – property, vacation homes, and investments.   And by doing so, we’ve confused abundance with survival.   They are nowhere near the same thing, although they sometimes exist within…

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starting over again at any point in your life

I suppose the best way to start this post is life anything we start in life in the wake of so much we are still processing …   Ironically, I’ve always found the best advice to anchor to is often in contradiction to what everyone else’s opinion or advice might be. How do we start when we’re…

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the story of my little white house

There’s something I feel I need to confess.   I’m not sure if confess is the right word – it certainly wasn’t a sin or wrongdoing. Perhaps what I’m looking for is to be witnessed, even if no one actually reads this post, there is something concrete and ritualistic about publishing words in the digital…

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The Deeper Thing

I’ve been home sick for a few days now. Not the kind of sick where you think you’re dying, mind you, but the kind where you can’t go out in public, but you’re still healthy enough to read, listen to podcasts, and journal between naps, tea, and soup.   So I went down a rabbit…

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home (2)

I don’t think I really understood what home was until now.   It took loss to open me up to it.   It took the loss of one of my most central and formative relationships. It took immigrating to a different country, cultural context, and land. It took deciding to heal deep trauma – ancestral,…

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south node in scorpio kind of spice

My ancestors were wanderers. Not at first, but after seeking political, religious, and cultural asylum in Canada in the early 1900’s, they moved from one settlement to another, transversing the country and eventually settling in BC, Canada. Then was the part where they burned all of their shit to the ground. Over and over again….

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letters to my mom part 2

Dear mom,   You once told me that I’m your best friend and I’ve always resented that. You see, I don’t want to be your friend. Don’t want to be the person you call when you are upset or anxious.   I never agreed to that.   What I want is to be your daughter….

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I think I finally made it

Success   I think I finally “made it”.   No, I haven’t hit 100k in my business (truth be hold I haven’t even hit 5 figures, let alone 6!). No, I haven’t sold out my programs. Nope, haven’t found my soulmate, or bought my dream house (I’m actually in the process of a very difficult…

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choice point

I had a realization today. It’s one of those realizations that is cumulative, you know? Like you could feel it for years. Like you thought you knew it. Like you thought you were over it – or at least that your reckoning with it was done. Complete. And now I sit with it and realize…

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